it is done, is it?

well,
i have tranferred my daughter to the care of her mother for the time being.it's probably the best thing for me to do i order to prepare for war. i gotta chance to see her mother again. she looked as good as ever, but, i'll never tell... the last thing i needed was to put my foot in my mouth by complementing her. She engaged me in some small talk, which i enjoyed, to say the least. her little boy is getting so big! it was sad to leave them. i think i was meant to have a family. for now, i don't. As much as i hate to admit it. i wish that i could have taken them all home with me. perhaps it is for the best that i didn't. what is done is done.

on another note, i am considering going on a raw foods diet for one week to see if i like it. i think that type of diet will cleanse and rejuvenate my digestive system. i may even loose a couple of pounds. who knows? i think that if i consume enough water, i will be fine. i need to purge my soul. this form of self deprivation may do my soul some justice. time will tell. I will start when i get off vacation which should be mid tuesday.

I am in the town that i went to high school in, reminiscing fondly of the days of old. i miss the good old days. what i really miss is the innocence of youth.

I am going to jacksonville right now. i hope to indulge in some strip club action!!! I damn sure want to go to the player's club tonight! i probably will settle for watching the new batman movie and going to the grown and sexy spot. I can sport my new kenneth cole shirts or G. Beene slacks i picked up while shopping on vacation.

i really am undecided what to do with my life after tha army. I am really leaning towards getting a cooking job and going to culinary school with my GI bill. i always wanted to do that. i've lived enough of a fucked life, satisfying the needs and/ or goals of others, that i really find the goal to be admirable, respectable, and obtainable. it's not really glamorous, but glamor needs one to behold it. i am in my own zone. watch out!